


it’s too late to say goodbye

by brunetteandblond



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Happy Ending, Introspection, POV Chloe, Sad, Season 4 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-29
Updated: 2019-05-29
Packaged: 2020-03-26 15:52:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19008976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brunetteandblond/pseuds/brunetteandblond
Summary: Lucifer is gone, but Chloe’s life isn’t over.—Just a short ficlet





	it’s too late to say goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this cute lil thing! Please review if you can! Xoxo

She sees him when her eyes are closed. The man she once feared and the man she loves are one, now. Balanced, equal. He’s a good man, she knows this as fact (and realizes it never should have been a debate).

His name is always at the tip of her tongue, waiting to escape with a gasp when she inevitably sees him again. She _has_ to see him again. She needs to.

She puts on a strong face for her friends, knowing the pain they’re in. Ella, Trixie, and Dan, they don’t understand. She can’t explain he’s in Hell, but she doesn’t have another explanation either. Her answers don’t satisfy them, but she doesn’t want to talk about him either. The truth sits in the back of her throat and she’s afraid one day it will roar out.

Amenadiel and Linda fear the worst (that their child’s uncle is gone in Hell forever). They don’t know how to help Chloe, suffering in their own grief and learning how to be parents at the same time.

Maze is angry. She seethes with anguish and fury when she arrives at his penthouse every morning and doesn’t find him there. She’s not necessarily pissed off at Lucifer, but at the fucked up self-sacrificing situation. For once, she wished he was selfish. 

For Chloe, her hope is a facade. An act of denial. ‘He’s going to come back’ has become a mantra she repeats in her head over and over again. When she wakes up. When she goes to sleep. When she breathes.

Sometimes she feels him next to her. When she’s on a case or when she’s just sitting at home. She expects to hear a “Detective!” Or even, maybe, a “Chloe” in a soft voice, like he’s afraid to say it. She misses his presence. His overwhelming ability to make her feel like she was never alone.

He got on her nerves. He said the wrong things. He made the worst decisions. But he was always there for her. Always the ever so loyal devil. As partners, friends, and maybe even more than that.

She thought about the way his hands feel on hers. The way his eyes met her own had and had shown her the world. The way he laughs and plays with her daughter. The way he seeks justice (and punishment) as much as she does. The way he pretends to not care (but really does). The way he helps his friends, whatever the cost. The way they solve a case and feel overwhelming pride. The way he looks at her with adoration. She remembers the little things. He’s always on her mind and she’s not sure if she’s ever ready to let go.

He’s hers. And she’s his. He left with part of her heart and she wants it all back with him. She just wants to hold him again, whisper in his ear that he’s a good man, and promise to love him for as long as she lived (and beyond).

But, despite the hurt, she’s living. She has a daughter, a job, a life. She’s not completely lost without him. He didn’t take all of her away, she’s still badass Chloe Decker. No one can change that. But it’s the small things that make her feel alone. It’s the emptiness that keeps her up at night. It’s the forgetting of his smile that makes her cry in the shower. It’s the way she remembers him loving her and it being as real as how she feels for him.

She’s not gone. Not totally. She gets better. Stronger. Happier.

So, when she hears the word, “Detective,” followed up with a more quiet, “Chloe,” she’s able to turn around, meet his eyes, and let out what was always on the tip of her tongue without it shattering her. 

“Lucifer.” 


End file.
